Valley Voices

Pat Dodds: Stop me, Fresno, if you’ve heard this one before

Elvis impersonator Jeremy Pearce is a popular performer in Fresno.
Elvis impersonator Jeremy Pearce is a popular performer in Fresno. Fresno Bee File 2010

I would never say that nothing ever happens in Fresno, but it sometimes does seem that the same things keep happening over and over again. For example, take a look at these local highlights of 2015, from the pages of The Bee:

January – The David Bowie tribute band Space Oddity and the Queen tribute band Queen Nation play at Warnors Theatre. … A Fresno man is arrested after making a Facebook post about his plans for a drug deal. … The Roy Orbison tribute band Wiley Ray and the Big O Band play at the Tower Theatre. … A Fresno teenager accidentally shoots himself in the leg with a rifle while trying to scare his ex-girlfriend. … Elvis Presley tribute singer Jeremy Pearce and The Memphis Sons play at the Paul Shaghoian Hall. … A Fresno man accidentally shoots himself in the hand with a shotgun during an argument.

February – A major winter storm hits Central California, but it does not make a significant dent in the drought.

March – The Earth, Wind & Fire tribute artist Larry Dunn and his band play at Warnors Theatre. … An El Niño is detected, but it’s not strong enough to end the drought. … Police arrest a man who passes out in a car, with a handgun in his lap, in a drive-through lane at a Fresno In-N-Out restaurant.

April – Led Zeppelin tribute band Led Zepagain and AC/DC tribute band Bon Fire play at Warnors Theatre. … Two people are arrested in a stolen car in Fresno after the California Highway Patrol stops them for driving while using a phone. … Storms bring rain and snow to California, but it’s nowhere near enough to ease the drought. … Two people are arrested in Fresno after they lock themselves out of a stolen car and then try to break into it.

May – Aerosmith tribute band Aeromyth and Van Halen tribute band Fan Halen play at Warnors Theatre. … Rain and snow fall in California, but they do not end the drought. … Beatles tribute band Abbey Road plays at the Tower Theatre. … A woman is arrested for allegedly using a pink stun gun on customers at a Fresno Walmart.

June – Led Zeppelin tribute band Zoso plays at Fulton 55. … A Fresno boy accidentally shoots himself with a handgun during an altercation. . . Tribute band Legends of Motown plays the music of the Temptations, Four Tops and Marvelettes at the Tower Theatre.

July – Doors tribute band The Double Doors play at Fulton 55. … Tool tribute band Arizona Bay plays at Strummers.

August – Beatles tribute band The Fab plays at the Tower Theatre. … The National Weather Service predicts a massive El Niño for this winter, but it almost certainly won’t be enough to end the drought. … Santana tribute band Caravanserai and Doors tribute band Strange Days play at Warnors Theatre. … A man is arrested after a stolen gun is found in a box of Fruity Pebbles cereal.

September – El Niño is still coming, but it won’t end the drought . … A Fresno man is arrested for aiming a laser at a police helicopter.

October – “Elvis Meets the Beatles: The Dream Concert,” at Frank’s Place, features Jeremy “Elvis” Pearce and The Beetles. … A huge El Niño continues to be predicted, but it really won’t be enough to end the drought. … A man is shot in the head after he points a toy gun at another man.

November – Storms bring a record amount of rain to Fresno, but it’s nowhere near enough to end the drought.

December – Beatles tribute band The Fab Four plays at the Tower Theatre. … A Fresno boy accidentally shoots his friend in the back while firing out of a car’s sunroof. … Mothers of Invention tribute band Zappa Plays Zappa plays at the Tower Theatre. … Depeche Mode tribute band Strangelove plays at Strummer’s. … The coming El Niño will probably be one of the strongest in decades, but there’s only a 50-50 chance that it will bring much more snow and rain than normal to Central California.

Pat Dodds is a resident of Fresno.

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