Fresno dad is turning his life around as needle exchange clinic loses support
Douglas Nelson began to turn his life around in March with the help of a needle exchange pilot program that, until recently, operated out of the Fresno County Health Department building.
The 26-year-old Fresno father had become addicted to Xanax to treat his seizures and was in desperate need of help. This spring, he was welcomed by Dr. Marc Lasher of the San Joaquin Valley Free Medical Clinic and Needle Exchange, where he received medical assistance to manage his withdrawal symptoms. .
“I couldn’t get off benzos by myself without having a seizure or without properly tapering off. I was taking 6 to 12 milligrams of benzos a day at the time,” he said. “I get in there and he takes me off Xanax and puts me on a much milder benzo called clonazepam.”
Lasher says the clinic has helped many people like Nelson break their addiction, and its needle exchange program has been life-saving for hard-to-reach addicts.
The Fresno County Board of Supervisors voted, 3-2, to shut down the county’s support for the program at the end of August, giving the clinic 30 days to relocate.
When Nelson heard of the news, he worried that he might not be able to continue with his treatment in the same way.
“I even told Dr. Lasher, ‘how do you think it’s going to be when I stop taking this?’ I know I’m almost done with the dose. But, ‘will I have a seizure?’” he said.
However, Nelson was pleased to hear the needle exchange program will continue in Fresno.
Dallas Blanchard, the program manager and CFO of the San Joaquin Valley Free Medical Clinic and Needle Exchange, said that they will move out of the Health Department Building and look for office space to rent.
“If we don’t find a space by the end of August we will use our old RV as a mobile clinic and set up at a street based location until we can find something to rent,” Blanchard said.
Blanchard said having their own space will allow them to expand both the days and hours they can offer services, whereas the Health Department was only available on weekends. This expanded access will enable them to help more people like Nelson, who have a history of drug addiction.
Fresno father’s journey to recovery
Nelson first began treatment at the Aegis methadone clinic at Shields and Millbrook avenues in 2021, after struggling with heroin and fentanyl use while living on the streets.
“I started and got sober, I got up to my dose that kept me steady. I wasn’t using and everything was going good with work. I was starting a new relationship. Life was great,” he said.
On April 9, 2022, Nelson’s first daughter was born, but she experienced complications that required immediate medical attention.
Just two weeks later, she died in his arms.
“It was hard. Honestly, afterward I got in my car and thought, ‘You know what, I’m going to go use,’” he said.
But he resisted the urge to relapse because of his fiancée. He wanted to be a responsible father figure to her two children.
“I took this oath that my daughter’s looking down on me, I have two other kids waiting on me, I couldn’t go backwards,” he said. “For the majority of my life, if I had problems and couldn’t deal with them, I would go get high. But this was the most traumatic experience I had gone through, and that wasn’t an option for me. I didn’t allow that to be an option for me.”
That said, the challenges for Nelson with processing his grief didn’t end there. About two months after his daughter’s passing, he started experiencing panic attacks and nightmares.
“I had panic attacks to the point that I thought I was having a heart attack. I was going in and out of the hospital. It felt like I was dying,” he said.
Nelson said doctors told him he was experiencing anxiety, but the panic attacks and nightmares continued for two more years, which led him to using Xanax to cope.
“I started taking Xanax and everything stopped, the nightmares stopped, the anxiety stopped. I felt normal, I was able to be a dad and go to work. I was able to control these feelings. It gave me a piece of my life back,” he said.
Now that he’s off Xanax and receiving help from the needle exchange program, Nelson said he finally feels like he’s getting his life back together again.
“I feel like I will feel complete once I’m done with my treatment and I don’t have a seizure. I know in my heart I’m never going to look back,” he said. “I’m going through counseling once a week as well. They switched my counselor to a woman who also had a daughter that passed away, so I’m able to talk to her and she relates with my stories.”
Nelson also recently quit cigarette smoking and expects to be off his dose of clonazepam in the next couple of months.
“I’m on this hype to quit my bad habits and I’m just trying my best,” he said.
