Payback’s a poop: Fresno-area porch pirate gets a smelly surprise

Ever wanted to get payback on the person who stole a package from your front porch?

For one Fresno County resident, revenge never smelled so stinkin’ good.

After having a package stolen from their porch, this Fresno resident decided to get even and loaded up an empty box with poop.

So if a porch pirate ever returned, they would open up a gift box much worse than being filled with coal.

In this instance, the same thief came back just two days after stealing from the residence, according to the Fresno County Sheriff’s Office.

Wearing a Nike black hoodie, black beanie and black basketball shorts with white shoes, the thief nonchalantly approaches the front porch and bends over to pick up the package.

The crime is all caught on video via a Ring doorbell camera.

Unfortunately, there was no video to see the thief’s reaction when he opened up the wet box and realized it was a package full of poop.

It’s also unclear if the man ever was arrested.

Getting back at porch pirates, by the way, is happening more and more.

So would-be thieves might want to reconsider taking other people’s packages.

Three years ago in Florida, for example, a woman who had dog medicine stolen from her porch pulled off a similar act of revenge.

She collected a week’s worth of dog poop and put it in an Amazon package then wrapped the box in Christmas wrapping paper, according to Fox 13 News.

The package was left out on her porch, and sure enough, ended up stolen.

But the woman said she hasn’t had any other incidents occur since wrapping up the smelly surprise.

Other homeowners have gotten fed up with the situation, too, and intentionally left boxes out rigged with alarms or noisemakers.

The Fresno County Sheriff’s Office couldn’t resist having some fun with the retaliation on this porch thief, too.

Prior to sharing the footage, the Sheriff’s Office edited the video by inserting the Chris Brown song “Deuces” in the background.

Because all porch pirates deserve a crappy holiday.

This story was originally published December 17, 2021 at 6:47 PM.