‘Work things out together.’ Fresno couple met during WWII. She built ships, he was in Army
Arthur Olesen, 101, and Marian Olesen, 100, swept each other off their feet the first night they met, ballroom dancing in San Francisco during World War II.
Marian was a former beautician working in a shipyard as a “Rosie the Riveter.” Arthur was an Army man tasked with electrical work and operating spotlights at Bay Area bases.
Arthur still remembers the way his wife of 75 years looked that night.
“She was wearing a black suit and a white collar and high heels,” Arthur said Tuesday from the living room of their home south of Fresno. The rural home they built in 1950 sits on a 20-acre raisin farm where Arthur grew up.
The romance and glamour of their dancing days has faded, but their commitment to each other has not.
“Being married and being together that long, seeing each other every day, is not an easy chore,” Arthur said. “You always got something that pops up that maybe you don’t agree on, and it’s always something that you have to work out.
“But hold your temper and do what you think is right, and don’t just throw everything out the window and take off and say, ‘I’m going to get a divorce,’ or things like that. You don’t do that. You work things out together.”
Marian shared some advice, too: “Just get along together.”
One of their three daughters, Judy Litten, interjected: “Mom, you’re very forgiving.
“She won’t talk about herself. She’s extremely forgiving and forgetful of any error. She doesn’t hold grudges.”
What do they like about each other?
“She was a good dancer and she was a good looker, and I like pretty women,” Arthur said. “We got along fine, other than that smoking deal.” (Arthur convinced Marian to stop smoking early in their relationship.)
He said she’s also a good person, “not a drinker,” and a “very good mother.”
Marian likes “everything” about Arthur and that he’s “very, very helpful.”
Litten knows there’s more to their relationship than that.
“Life is frustrating when you get to their age, and you can’t hear and you can’t see … but they want to be together,” their daughter said. “They are not happy when they are apart. They support each other in different ways.”
Litten said they aren’t very alike, or much for words now, “but their actions show us how they care for each other.”
Arthur continued electrical and plumbing work in the Valley after his time in the Army, along with working their raisin farm until his retirement in 1990. Marian stayed home once they had children to take care of their daughters, Judy, Joan and Janet.
“They always got their hair curled every Sunday morning and went to church,” Arthur said. “She took care of them real well.”
Arthur and Marian also worked real well together, Litten recalled of her parents. “They did a lot for us and we didn’t realize it. … Every day I see things that I’ve overlooked.”
Family and their Christian faith is a big part of their lives and love.
Tears filled Arthur’s eyes when talking about reciting the Lord’s Prayer every night.
“I’m thinking of what the Lord’s Prayer means. … It’s just hard to explain,” Arthur said. “You can’t be without the Lord.”
Litten described their long relationship and lives as a “miracle” and source of strength.
“To have parents that have gone through all these stages, you have ways of knowing how to pray and how to ask for guidance for that when you go through it,” Litten said. “It’s really a comfort to know that they’ve hung in there.”
This story was originally published February 13, 2020 at 11:34 AM.
