Enter the Warzone, straight shots of pretzel logic.
• Now you know why 49ers owner Jed York and general manager Trent Baalke so rarely step in front of microphones.
“We’re not out to win the press conference,” York said early on.
No danger of that.
• Credit York for answering every question for nearly an hour. He talked and talked and talked until it became perfectly clear to every 49ers fan within earshot that they wouldn’t want to work for this pipsqueak, either.
• A 34-year-old NFL owner who refers to pro football players as “kids” sounds patronizing at best and demeaning at worst.
Especially one who got the team from his mommy and daddy.
• Baalke, for his part, insisted he and Jim Harbaugh got along fine. Never mind all you heard and read over the past year and a half.
Which points to a dysfunctional relationship between coach and owner. No other way to slice it.
• Still hard to believe Harbaugh is returning to college football. Look for Michigan to get better in a hurry — and for Harbaugh to wind up back in the NFL not too long after that. It’s the man’s pattern.
• Interim Raiders coach Tony Sparano made it clear he wants the permanent job. It says here owner Mark Davis could do a lot worse, and probably will.
• With the No. 4 overall pick, the Raiders are in position to draft the big-play receiver quarterback Derek Carr desperately needs (Alabama’s Amari Cooper) or a premier edge rusher opposite Khalil Mack.
Tough to go wrong either way.
• It’s been years since college football gave us a quarterback matchup as tasty as Marcus Mariota-Jameis Winston, or a coaching match up as intriguing as Nick Saban-Urban Meyer.
Too bad it came at the expense of the regular season, or however that preposterous argument used to go.
• Wyoming basketball coach Larry Shyatt called UNLV’s upset of then-No. 3 Arizona the Mountain West Conference’s “signature win.”
For signature loss, we nominate Fresno State becoming 1-11 Marist’s only victim.
• The starting point guard can’t get his fall semester grades until the last possible moment and another promising recruit exits the program under circumstances that are both slightly mysterious and all-too-familiar.
Yup, that about sums it up.
• Despite all of that, it’s way too early for anyone who expected the Bulldogs to build upon last year’s finish to give up on the season.
Provided Cezar Guerrero is in uniform Wednesday in New Mexico (and a little birdie tells me he’s been practicing with the starters), the Bulldogs will finish .500 or better in conference.
Still like this team’s talent.
• About 10% of the emailers, callers and Twitter responders felt Sunday’s column on the offseason challenges facing Fresno State coach Tim DeRuyter was too harsh in its criticisms.
The other 90% felt it wasn’t harsh enough.
• Don’t subscribe to the theory that DeRuyter can win only with Pat Hill’s players. Coaches win and lose with the players they’re given.
Now if you want to say DeRuyter hasn’t proven he can win with his recruits, fair enough. That’s what the next two years will tell us.
• For no particular reason: Luc Longley
• Johnny Manziel says, “It’s about being accountable and doing what I’m gonna say instead of looking like a jackass.”
Yeah, a jackass that can’t change its stripes.
• The NFL suspended Lions defensive tackle Ndamukong Suh for Sunday’s playoff game for intentionally stepping on Aaron Rodgers’ ankle.
Think of it as a belated Christmas present to Tony Romo’s back vertebrae.