Tiger Woods crashed again, and you want to know the worst part of his latest two-and-barbecue at a golf major?
We don’t even care anymore.
Golf’s favorite villain missed the cut for the third straight major championship, and none of us could be troubled to roll out of bed early enough to rubberneck at his rain-delayed departure at the PGA Championship on an idle Saturday morning.
The thrill of getting a thrill out of Tiger is gone. We are so over being over him. Once a guy cards an 85 like the rest of us amateur hacks, it’s a little hard to get worked up over his latest undoings.
Tiger loses so much, and loses so badly, it’s no longer fun to see him three-putt his way to a bogey
You didn’t do a fist bump when the 79-time PGA Tour winner dropped to 0 for 10 for the hope-forsaken season. You didn’t get any joy out of watching the Next Jack Nicklaus play like the Current Jack Nicklaus.
Tiger loses so much, and loses so badly, it’s no longer fun to see him three-putt his way to a bogey.
It’s just sad.
Every sport needs a bad guy who is good enough to root against. Baseball forever has the Yankees. Basketball has LeBron. Football has the New England Belichicks. They make you watch a championship game even when your team isn’t in the trophy hunt.
For golf, no one glued you to the TV like Eldrick Woods.
We loved Tiger at the beginning, what with 14 major victories in 12 years. He won big, he won small, he won with one shredded knee tied behind his back.
Then came 2009, and the National Enquirer scandal, and the infidelity, and the confession, and the car-meets-fire hydrant.
Golf finally had its bad guy. Now, he’s just bad, period.
We love upsets, but you can’t have any upset without a prohibitive favorite. And just who do you want to see collapse today on the PGA’s back nine?
Phil Mickelson? Too aw-shucks.
Rory McIlroy? Too dimpled in the cheeks.
Bubba Watson? Too bubba.
Jordan Spieth is too young. Jim Furyk is too “Jim Who?” Louis Oosthuizen has too many vowels to pronounce.
As for Tiger …
Tiger just isn’t Tiger enough anymore, and won’t be ever again.
Jack Nicklaus roared into his fourth decade. Tiger is all meow.
He turns 40 this winter. He hasn’t won a major in seven years. He hasn’t won a PGA event in 24 months. For those who say Nicklaus won four majors after his 37th birthday, remember this: Nicklaus had his first winless season at the age of 39; Tiger just had his third.
In other words, Jack roared into his fourth decade. Tiger is all meow. Tiger’s career was whistling at the graveyard long before the leaderboard was posted on the lawns of Whistling Straits on moving day.
The days of loving to hate Tiger are gone. Now, all we can do is feel a little bit sorry for him, knowing the senior PGA circuit can’t come soon enough.
- 1. Dear Patriots fans: Are you really going to complain that the NFL has it out for you and your star-kissed quarterback? Seriously? Does the term “Tuck Rule” really mean nothing to you? Signed, Raider Nation
- 2. Three Thursdays till the Fresno State football season opener. Do you know where your starting quarterback is?
- 3. The Fresno State athletic department is blowing hot air again – this time, enough to float a blimp. Great marketing idea, but with Fresno being Fresno, watch this be the football season in which El Niño rainstorms plague the flight deck.