Baseball’s Giants are done before Thursday’s first swing and miss, because Madison Bumgarner’s broken pitching hand says so.
Basketball’s Warriors are undone, because Steph Curry’s knees and ankles have morphed back into crushed ice and glass shards.
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What’s a local sports fan supposed to do next, pretend we go to Fresno Grizzlies games for the Astros and not the tacos? Try to figure out where the Fresno Football As In Soccer Club fits in the American soccer food pyramid?
We were going to catch a Fresno State football spring practice this week, only to find out the Bulldogs are on spring break. But we can still dream about what might be to come, because it’s better than anything else.
Marcus McMaryion is still the quarterback, and he’s still good, so what more do you want to get you through the summer? There’s a new defensive coordinator, we’re told, but you only want to know his name if Fresno State gives up half a hundred to Boise State.
All that matters is that Fresno State coach Jeff Tedford is back for a second go, and that McMaryion doesn’t get hurt between now and the Sept. 1 gala against Idaho. With visions of Bumgarner and Curry in our nightmares, double-bubble wrap McMaryion’s knee ligaments. Surround his quarterback pocket with electric fencing. Give him mental reps in a video game module, for all we care. Just keep him in one functioning piece, because he is the only story we’ve got this year. Otherwise, you have a Fresno State men’s basketball team without a general, a Fresno State athletics department without a leader, and matching Fresno State softball and baseball teams that must be saving their best days for the postseason.
Every time a Raiders fans gets amped for the NFL Draft, someone kills the draft party by name-dropping JaMarcus Russell. Just when you were ready to forgive college basketball for all its FBI indictments, they shove a fistful of Duke down your TV screen.
McMaryion and the Fresno State football team, it is. Give us more Tedford saying nothing of revelatory note at a news conference. Bore us with fascinating details of the linebacker rotation. Print out reports about your defense forcing three turnovers in a recent practice, because that sounds better than saying your offense gave up three turnovers. Bulldogs vs. Bulldogs in the spring. Because, even when they lose, they win.