GOOD MORNING. It’s Monday, Oct. 31, 2016, and I’m here with your helping of the Morning Scoop. (Subscribe here to get the Scoop in your inbox because sometimes you accidentally leave caps lock when you start typing, too.)
What You Need to Know
• Fresno police are looking for an armed suspect who robbed a Robertitos and fired a shot into the ceiling before leaving with cash but not food.
• Despite chilly weather, little parking and long lines, thousands of folks showed up over the weekend to cast early votes, and everyone was patient and well-behaved and maybe there is hope for humanity yet.
• A Florida man has been charged with five counts of attempted murder after he grabbed his assault rifle and some beer and started shooting at passing cars because 2nd Amendment, Founding Fathers, ‘Murica ... you get it.
• The wife of a Massachusetts cop tried to fake her own robbery and incriminate Black Lives Matter activists, but police were like, “Yeah, no.”
• College of the Sequoias President Stan Carrizosa was given a 33% raise while his faculty received a 6% raise, which is an amazing way to keep up morale on campus. A+ work, everybody.
• It’s sad to see what earthquakes are doing to the architecture and history of Italy. Also the humans, of course.
What You Want to Know
• Check out this amazing altar created for Prince at Arte Américas, as well as the other stunning tributes honoring loved ones for Día de los Muertos.
• Here are some tips from experts on how to stay safe this Halloween. And here’s one from a different kind of expert: Stay home, turn off the lights, eat all the candy yourself.
• What is Cyclocross? Messy! Also kinda bloody!
What You Wish You Didn’t Know
• A New Mexico mother and her adult son were arrested in an elaborate panties heist. You read that right.
• And finally, every year some turd who thinks he’s funny dresses up in blackface for Halloween. Here’s this year’s turd.
Good Monday to you all!
Heather McLane: email@example.com, @heather_mclane