Heyyy. It’s Friday, Oct. 14, 2016, and I’m here with your helping of the Morning Scoop. (Subscribe here to get the Scoop in your inbox because although the news may not be great, you are.)
What You Need to Know
• A series of terrible things went down in Tulare yesterday.
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• A bunch of terrible employees were arrested at Coalinga State Hospital.
• The Fresno County Republican Party is standing by their terrible man.
• You’re taking a terrible risk driving on Highway 99, the deadliest major highway in the country.
• Michelle Obama exists, and she is the antidote to terrible.
What You Want to Know
• Dave and Buster’s is opening next week in Fresno and it sure looks like something.
• There’s a new little lion cub at the Fresno Chaffee Zoo. It’s cute, probably!
• I’ve never related more to a headline in my life.
• Toddlers pretending to be Chip and Joanna Gaines from ‘Fixer Upper’ is the palate cleanser this week needs.
What You Wish You Didn’t Know
• And finally, the coyotes have turned on us.
Heather McLane: email@example.com, @heather_mclane