Enter the Warzone, short takes for short attention spans.
- If Ronnie Lott played in today's kinder, gentler NFL, he'd be living in a homeless shelter because his salary wouldn't cover the fines he'd be levied.
These days, safeties draw penalties for just looking askance at a wide receiver.
- Look, we're all for policing helmet-to-helmet shots. Concussions lead to brain damage. Understood.
But at some point, and we're moving steadily in that direction, it's no longer football.
- Exhibition or not, Rodney Terry treated Friday night like a real game. Fresno State's new men's basketball coach wasted no time ditching the suit jacket and planting himself on one knee in front of the bench.
Terry exhorted his players constantly and made his points with the officials. When Kevin Olekaibe didn't get a call after getting hip-checked, Terry chirped, "How do you miss that call? That's an easy call to make!"
- After vastly exceeding expectations as a freshman, Olekaibe appears even more confident in his jumper and secure in his role as leading scorer.
Let's see what happens against zone defenses, but Bulldogs fans will be glad to know the team has at least one legit Division I starter.
- If a stiff wind ever blew through the Save Mart Center, Jonathan Wills and Grant Hefeng might want to grab hold of something sturdy.
Those guys are skiii-nnn-y.
- Good defenses don't give up 45-yard touchdown passes on third-and-14. They don't allow 53-yard touchdown runs – up the middle – on first down. They don't let receivers get 10 yards behind the secondary for 75-yard TDs.
And yet, Pat Hill will continue to insist there's nothing wrong, both with the defensive scheme and the coaching. He's the only one that thinks so.
- LSU 9, Alabama 6 in overtime. Boy, we want to see that one again. (Yawn.)
- On consecutive plays against Oregon State, Stanford's Andrew Luck used a spin move to pick up a first down, then threw a fade prettier than Anne Hathaway for a touchdown.
You were saying, Phil Simms?
- Is the NBA in a lockout or something? Sorry, hadn't noticed.
- A tip of the chapeau to Clovis for landing a stage in next year's Amgen Tour of California. A sprint finish is likely, given the flat run-in to town, but Sonora is so dang far away that a breakaway isn't out of the question.
- Enjoyed "Unguarded," ESPN's documentary about Chris Herren, but it would've been even better with subtitles.
Herren's Southie accent is thicker than chowdah.
- Did we read that right? Kelly Slater reported a mathematical error in the Association of Surfing Professionals standings that delayed his 11th world title? Now that's some gnarly sportsmanship.
- For no particular reason: Steve Atwater.
- Because rock climbing is a niche sport, the general public doesn't comprehend what speed climbers such as Hans Florine and Alex Honnold are doing in Yosemite.
Put it this way: It would take longer than 2 hours, 37 minutes for most folks to climb a 3,000-foot tall ladder leaning up against El Capitan.
- See everyone bright and early this morning at the Two Cities Marathon & Half.
Won't be running – that's way too tiring – but studies have found that scribbling into small notepads burns almost as many calories.