Before we begin Brett Favre Un-retirement Column No. 3, let me just say that nothing that happens this season will mire his football legacy.
Not 50 interceptions and zero touchdowns. Not an 0-16 season. Not even -- gasp! -- getting injured or benched.
His longevity and energy and statistics make him a Hall of Famer, one of the greatest all-time. He can only add to that.
Now if Brett Favre came up to you and asked to borrow your car, swore he'd bring it right back, what would you say? OK, you probably would say yes because there are other factors. He has a lot of money and doesn't really need your car and all that. He's a famous football player and really, what's worth more, a car or a story with Brett Favre in it?
But what if Favre told you he hit a hole-in-one? What if he said he needed a loan for a restaurant chain? What if he said he'd never taken steroids?
With tears streaming from both eyes, Brett Favre the Packer said goodbye to football in March 2008. However, the itch to play again was too much, and Favre played last season with the Jets, only to retire for a second time. But the soap opera isn't finished, as he's now a Viking.
The point being, there is long-term value in a person's word. In the real world. In the business world. In the sports world. Favre's vows aren't even good for a month these days, as he crossed the country Tuesday in a private jet like a Lee Greenwood song, from Mississippi up to Minnesota, threw on a jersey, went to practice, and became a member of the Minnesota Vikings.
A person's integrity is important, no matter how ancient that sounds, and Favre's erodes every time he changes his mind, every time he says one thing and feels another, every time he cries those needless tears of inevitable deception.
The great ones are supposed to make us cry. This one makes our eyes roll.
They say Favre can't give up football, it just isn't true. Flip-flopping. Escapable language. Forgotten promises. He's been doing a politician's work for a while now.
That said, it's great, isn't it?
Sports are fueled by drama and story lines, and it doesn't get a lot better than Favre in purple. The state to the west has to cheer for Communism. The state to the east has to watch its ex date an enemy. Also, there is the Homecoming Court contest to worry about.
You might have heard the Vikings and Packers play a couple of times every year.
That's a good rivalry. Rivers divide those two states and there's blood in the water. You sometimes see people wearing those half-Oakland A's, half-San Francisco Giants hats. You would never see that in purple and green. The fabric would refuse to be bound together. The hat-maker would lose his hat-making license. There would be a special session in both state legislatures to ensure such an attempt was never made again.
You sometimes see those cute signs that have the logos of two different rival schools and read, "A house divided." Parents hang them in their kitchens when the son goes to UCLA and the daughter goes to USC. There are no houses divided in Wisconsin. If you wanted to cheer for purple, you get your own house. On the other side of the river.
Favre is the perfect anti-hero. Tuesday on the Minneapolis Star Tribune Web site, they posted man-on-the-street video clips asking Twin Cities' residents what they thought of the Favre signing. A man named David put it well: "He was throwing a lot to purple jerseys when he was with the Packers, so might as well give him a shot."
They're buying Favre, but only if the other option is chronic mediocrity.
His last deception was apparently only a dodge of training camp, so he could show up at the last minute and lead a team he has no credit with, his immense arm and the Vikings' immense need scraping away the mess of it all.
This moment was beyond unlikely. Favre holding up a purple No. 4 jersey at a news conference? You figured you'd see Tim Robbins club an otter and hold up the carcass first.
The man has taken absurd to new levels. He's Michael Jordan to the third power. And the thing is, no one would care that he can't give it up. We understand that. We appreciate it in our sports stars, when Curt Schilling drags his body back out for another season, even pity it when it goes wrong.
But this is just stunning. You wonder if he'll be able to keep a straight face at next year's retirement news conference. Or the next one. The Packers management looks smarter every day.
You just wonder who will appreciate him when he finally does retire. After all, he crossed the river, and burned a lot of bridges.
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