Dear Amy: I've just returned from a visit with my two kids to their dentist. My children are ages 5 and 2. I have noticed that in situations regarding my children, adults don't have any problem referring to me as "Mom."
The dental assistant and dentist (both women) called me Mom throughout the checkups. I have found this to be increasingly annoying.
I remember being called Mom by a nurse while I was in labor with my son two years ago.
I realize that this is an easy way to communicate with me, but I find it to be condescending and just lazy.
Am I being uptight?
-- Monica
Dear Monica: I completely agree with you that this is annoying.
Thinking about this, I realized that every technician and worker at my local veterinarian's office somehow manages to address me by name during animal examinations (where they also refer to my pets by their names).
If some health-care workers can manage this, then why not others?
Granted, family practitioners and their staffs are very busy, and their attention is properly focused on the children when they come in for an exam.
It is also fair to assume that people don't know if they should address you as "Monica," "Mrs. Smith, "Ms. Smith," "Ms. Your-childhood-surname" or "Dr. Smith." This is why health-care professionals should ask you how you would like to be addressed, and then make a note on your or your child's chart.
You can help this cause along the next time you encounter it by saying, "Oh, please call me Monica. Usually only my kids call me Mom."
Dear Amy: I agreed with your advice to "Disrupted Co-worker" to politely ask his food-chomping cubicle neighbor to eat quietly.
The direct approach is usually best, but I dealt with a similar situation in a little different way.
I had a cubicle neighbor who not only chomped loudly but also ate "fragrant" foods like corn nuts.
So, when the food came out I would say, "Hey, Dave, what are you eating over there?"
He'd tell me, and my reply was, "Sounds good. Can I have some?"
After having to share his stash a few times, Dave ate less-fragrant food more quietly!
-- Happily retired
Dear Retired: This is an effective solution to a problem that drives cubicle-dwellers crazy. Thank you.
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