A CHRISTMAS CAROL

One of the hardest things Ed Donaghy has ever done was leave his ministry as a Catholic priest. For months, he agonized over his conflicting desires to have a family and serve as a priest in the Sacramento Diocese.

QUESTION: A long-distance relative has a child with physical and mental disabilities. How do you prepare your children for their first visit over the holidays?

Add Bob Kelly to the list of financial services executives who aren't clamoring for the top job at Bank of America Corp.

Q: For years, my ex and I got along fine and always put the kids' best interest first. But now she has remarried and her husband has a set visitation and he will not deviate from his schedule, so my ex and I fight about our schedule, which seems ridiculous to me.

Q: I am a full-time nanny living with a single dad and his four young sons. The dad has given me free reign to deal with the kids and discipline them as I see fit when they are with me. I am much more strict and traditional than he is and although he doesn't mind how I handle things, he's not always willing to do the same things himself (or he's not as consistent).

Dear Mr. Dad: My wife and I are relatively well off and can give our kids whatever they want. But how can we be generous without spoiling them rotten?

A friend dropped off a copy of the Ellsworth American, a weekly from Down East Maine. The American still prints small town social news such as the following: "This is the last weekend for dinner at Fisherman's Inn. Bring your friends for their Thai mussels and nearly famous lobster bisque."

Just like millions of other children, my kids, Cady, age 10, and Hudson, 8, ride a bus to school each morning. Yet we never really thought about its mechanical marvels until we watched "How'd They Build That? School Bus."

As you plan your winter snow vacation, consider small or midsize resorts. You're likely to find less glitz and a warm welcome for your family. Here are five options.

What could be a greater gift to bestow on your daughter than a name with a heroic namesake, someone with an inspiring story to add a layer of pride to your little girl's feelings about her name - and give her great material for a school report?

Dear Scholastic VP Responsible for the Book Fair:

I never dreamed I'd find math games that my 5-year-old, Tom, couldn't wait to play. But that's exactly what happened when we logged on to Dream Box Learning, a fee-based Web site (with a two-week free trial) that delivers fun math lessons.

I was recently asked if I felt like I had different relationships with my biological kids as compared to my stepkids. And I know what the politically correct answer is. And I know what the truthful answer is. However, as stepmom I am subject scrutiny under the wicked myth and thus, to avoid it, I must be fair and blind in all things.

Everywhere I turn, every parent I know is talking about H1N1. It's okay if you are rolling your eyes at that very first sentence. I cringed just writing it.

My mom laughed at me when I was 5 years old, and I've never forgotten it.

Help your tot commemorate autumn with this change-of season collage, which uses fallen leaves to decorate a lovely handprint tree.

A growing list of dentists and orthodontists are using a capitalist's tool to combat cavities.

There are picky eaters, there are picky eaters who border on neurotic and there are wannabes.

If you plan on answering the door tonight, be prepared to see some skin.

Daylight Saving Time ended this week, with most of the country "falling back" an hour to return to Standard Time. This time change marks the end of the harvest, and store shelves and road side stands should offer wide varieties of squash, apples and pumpkin during this time.

Empower: one of my least favorite words--is the key word in the mission of Maria Shriver's annual Women's Conference, held this week in Long Beach: We Empower Women to be Architects of Change.

Raising a teen? Here's some advice from the book "How to Survive Your Teenager" (Hundreds of Heads Books, www.hundredsofheads.com, $13.95), straight from people who've done it:

Joanne Cantor's son was 5 years old when he passed an elaborate Halloween exhibit with a scarecrow oozing "bloody" macaroni-and-ketchup intestines.