Ask Amy: High school student should ignore rumor

September 30, 2013 

Dear Amy: I am a freshman in a new high school.

I love my new school. The teachers are awesome, I am involved in sports, and I have made many new friends.

However, there was a recent gossip incident that has me scratching my head. What is the best way to deal with a false rumor and figure out who started it without making a big deal out of the rumor, especially if it involves boys?

— Not big on gossip

Dear Gossip: You are being tested. This is common in ninth grade, and the fact that you are new to the school makes you a handy target.

Let your parents know this has happened; they need to know what's going on with you, even if you don't want them to do anything about it.

For now, do not react at all. Ignore this rumor and go about your business of doing well and making new friends.

If you become aware of anything beyond this, speak to a favorite teacher and/or the counselor at your school. In rare cases this can get seriously out of hand. If so, you must alert the school officials; they will intervene to shut it down.

Dear Amy: I work for a large trucking company that is owned by a family. I have been a loyal and very dependable employee for 11/2 years.

I always complete my primary job on time with good results and have been given extra projects, and complete them in a timely manner.

However, I have not gotten a raise, and according to the HR manager my evaluation has been on the owner/manager's desk for two months. I feel I should not have to continue asking HR about it because that should be part of her responsibility to see that raises are taken care of.

Any advice?

— Unappreciated

Dear Unappreciated: It is not the HR department's ultimate responsibility to make sure you get a raise; this responsibility is shared by you and the company owner/manager. The HR representative is supposed to shepherd the process and the paperwork along and serve as a liaison between you.

I assure you, no one is going to care about your raise as much as you do, so advocate for yourself.

Send an email to the manager/owner and copy the HR representative. Say, "I understand my evaluation may have gotten lost in the shuffle, and so I'm following through to see if there is anything further you need from me before you can process my paperwork. Please let me know."


You can contact Amy Dickinson via email at, follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.

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