***

Did I get my reluctant source to open up, or did Channel 30 beat me to the story? Is it embarrassing to watch a theater critic actually try to act? How do I handle the terror of having a large cow chucked at me? Does workman's comp cover bovine injuries?

So many questions. All I can say is you'll have to watch the video for the answers. Granted, if you aren't up on your Monty Python dialogue, the whole thing might be bewildering. Get a fan to explain.

And never forget: If someone calls your mother a chubby-cheeked rodent, don't hesitate to bawl them out in French.

The French taunter: Tyler Branco

Age: 20

Occupation: Student at Fresno City College. In the fall he'll transfer to Fresno State for a major in psychology and minor in acting.

Other characters he plays in "Spamalot": The Dancing Monk, the Mayor of Finland, Sir Bors the Decapitated Knight.

Past acting highlights: Ensemble of "Beauty and the Beast" at CenterStage Clovis Community Theatre, Sammy in "The Wedding Singer" and Rolf in "The Sound of Music" at Good Company Players.

Has he ever studied French? No

How he perfected the Taunter accent: He repeatedly watched John Cleese, who played the role in the movie "Monty Python and the Holy Grail."

How he blows the perfect raspberry: That's a trade secret.

Does everyone share a common trait with the French Taunter: "I think so," he says. "I'd describe myself as a nice guy. Each of us likes to have a mean person inside of them no matter how nice they are."

-- Donald Munro

IF YOU GO

"Monty Python's Spamalot," through March 17, Roger Rocka's Dinner Theater, 1226 N. Wishon Ave. gcplayers.com, (559) 266-9494, $29-$49

MORE ONLINE

To view "Jeers of Endearment," go to fresnobee.com/video.